KamaSutronics

The Plow/Probe

(also known as the Probe Plus.)

This was the first fucking machine I bought.  I was delighted.

I’d made a fuckzall previously, and the women I’d tried it with had responded… well, better than I could have hoped.  There were loud, extreme, extravagant orgasms, knocking furniture over in other states.

So it was only a matter of time before I upgraded.  I chose to buy the eXtreme Plow, a dark and gleaming thing from Orgasm Alley.

I didn’t know that the technology was just minutes away from being out of date.

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The ShockSpot

Author’s note: This was a review of an earlier model, so a lot of information is out of date in reference to the newer models.  Some more recent observations are available here.

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The ShockSpot is compact, sturdy, and shiny. It’s made from top-notch 80/20 materials. It’s programmable, positionable, and visually impressive.  If the ShockSpot had been brilliantly designed, it would be a bargain — even at $2,200.

But what is it that we actually want from a fucking machine, anyway?  This is the kind of question that sex toy designers really need to ask.

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Feeling the music.

It’s called “synesthesia” when your senses blend together.  You can taste music, or feel a smell, or hear a color.  These are beautiful strange moments.  A song might glow like a bright white light with darker green edges; a lover’s touch could become a deep note held for a long time.

That’s synesthesia.

For a while now I’ve been working on a music system.  I call it the Synestheatre.  The idea is simple: I want to play music for a woman so that she hears it and sees it and feels it, all through her body.  Lie on your back, close your eyes, and let the music play you.

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